“Take your opinions elsewhere”

NOS Magazine recently published an opinion piece written by Ivanova Smith regarding the issue of “Mental Age Theory”

NOS Magazine

One would think that being a magazine devoted to neurodiversity and open to “publishing opinions from many corners of the neurodiversity community” that censorship and blocking participation from advocates in discussions is counter to the mission.  Apparently, only those neurodiverse in the “right” way are allowed to comment and exchange opinions or answer questions from others.

Saskia Davis, published  her thoughts about the article above on NOS Magazine.  There was a follow-up comment to which Saskia wanted to reply and it was then that she realized that her post had disappeared and her reply was not able to be posted either.

I offered to publish Saskia’s responses on this site because I think they are worthy of being read and understood.  The first comment can be read on Developmental Disabilities Exchange.    The follow up comment is below in this post.

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NOS Magazine is a news and commentary source for thought and analysis about neurodiversity culture and representation. Expect long form journalism, reviews of pop culture, and more. NOS stands for ‘Not Otherwise Specified,’ a tongue-in-cheek reference to when a condition does not strictly fit the diagnostic criteria, or is in some way out of the ordinary.

Opinions: Not Otherwise Specified

Stories: Not Otherwise Specified

Perspectives: Not Otherwise Specified”

NOS Magazine is a publication for the neurodiversity community. As such, people who identify as a part of the neurodiversity community and/or who are neurodivergent in some fashion will be given publication preference in order to ensure that this publication is a voice of the community. We recognize and respect self-diagnosis as valid and do not have a standard of who is “disabled enough” to count.

Opinion

Published pieces are not necessarily the opinion of NOS Magazine. We are open to publishing opinions from many corners of the neurodiversity community.

 

Responding to: (from Saskia Davis)
Ivanova Smith
September 11, 2017 at 7:25 pm
“I going to share some examples people can to explain their love one support needs that don’t use mental age theory. I some people being asking me for alternatives……..” (http://nosmag.org/mental-age-theory-hurts-people-with-intellectual-disabilities/

I wrote:
“These are helpful suggestions.  How would you help a person understand the level of constant,  total care that is required for the support of someone who lacks the capacity to make safe decisions, lacks verbal ability to express what is wrong, and what s/he wants,  but has enough, almost understandable vocabulary to  frequently repeat the same few phrases,  can’t safely mobilize herself anywhere,  is absolutely distractable, and doesn’t  care to focus on anything except neckties or hats or cars, will choke due to putting food in her or his mouth before swallowing the last bite  if allowed to self feed, except that is impossible because s/he can’t load her own spoon, but can hold a glass and will choke if not dissuaded from laughing during drinking, while self-feeding, gets food all over her/his face,  body and clothes, laughs with delight when something or someone  falls on the floor  and finds it great fun to empty surfaces of their contents to see them fall,  or someone who can carry on a delightful, if limited conversation  but, who, if asked questions  or when another person  wants his food  or when he can’t have food from someone else’s plate, will throw a 20 minute  tantrum just like those that two year olds throw,   (only this person is 6 feet tall and weighs 160 pounds)  hollering, throwing himself on the floor, writhing, kicking screaming, hitting, biting, and who   has been unable to learn to tie his shoes or put them on the correct feet and who remains incontinent at the age of 21 despite many patient years of family members and caregivers’ attempts to help him achieve continence. In few enough words so that the reader or listener will stay engaged to understand the other points you are trying to make, how do you give a picture of such a person that allows another  to understand the intensive level of care  and careful planning for support that is needed and the struggles the person endures in order to make progress?  Thanks in advance for your suggestions.”

 

The title of this post is a quote from Sara Luterman, editor of NOS Magazine in answer to my question regarding removal of my own posts.

About us, Without us

 

This week I have had the opportunity to really see what trained self-advocates think of those who are not able to speak and share their own experiences or opinions.  I have been told over and over again by these trained self-advocates that as a parent/guardian, that my observations are self-serving and that “Nothing about us, without us”, the catch phase of self-advocates has nothing to do with guardians.

Sara Luterman for blog

 

Sara Luterman, editor of NOS Magazine, wrote “”Nothing about us without us” refers to disabled people. Since you are not disabled, it’s not about you.” Ms. Luterman sent me a link to an article she wrote in The Thinking Person’s Guide to Autism  and then added “You may find this helpful, particularly, ” Just because someone has difficulty voicing a coherent opinion, it doesn’t mean you get to hoist him or her up like some kind of grotesque ventriloquist dummy.”  Thank you, Ms. Luterman for letting me know what you think of people I know and love.

Comments from NOS editor Sara Luterman

Ms. Luterman makes many assumptions regarding the role of a guardian and clearly does not understand the legal and court appointed responsibility that a guardian has – that is to represent the person in their best interest.  If this role is denied, I’m curious how these trained self-advocates involve and understand those who are not able to voice their opinions to those who do not understand them.  While pushing their agenda forward without understanding or allowing those with guardians to share their perspective and needs they are practicing discrimination against those more vulnerable than the self-advocates who can read, write and speak themselves.

The censorship that is practiced by several groups of trained self-advocates makes it appear that there is unanimity in their advocacy for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities.  In fact, the opposite is true.  Even when people write “I am interested in others perspective on this, other than my own” the editor will not allow another perspective to be shared.

This is one reason that I write on this blog – to share other opinions and learn from others.  I have learned a great deal by the fact that I have been blocked from several sites that are run by trained self-advocates.  They have no intention of understanding the needs of others and are acting like selfish adolescents who are rebelling against their parents.   Will they continue on their developmental path to adulthood?

Comments to NOS Magazine regarding Mental Age Theory Sept 2017

 

NOS Magazine would not publish a comment responding to another parent asking for others perspective

About us, Without us

 

This week I have had the opportunity to really see what trained self-advocates think of those who are not able to speak and share their own experiences or opinions.  I have been told over and over again by these trained self-advocates that as a parent/guardian, that my observations are self-serving and that “Nothing about us, without us”, the catch phase of self-advocates has nothing to do with guardians.

Sara Luterman for blog

 

Sara Luterman, editor of NOS Magazine, wrote “”Nothing about us without us” refers to disabled people. Since you are not disabled, it’s not about you.” Ms. Luterman sent me a link to an article she wrote in The Thinking Person’s Guide to Autism  and then added “You may find this helpful, particularly, ” Just because someone has difficulty voicing a coherent opinion, it doesn’t mean you get to hoist him or her up like some kind of grotesque ventriloquist dummy.”  Thank you, Ms. Luterman for letting me know what you think of people I know and love.

Comments from NOS editor Sara Luterman

Ms. Luterman makes many assumptions regarding the role of a guardian and clearly does not understand the legal and court appointed responsibility that a guardian has – that is to represent the person in their best interest.  If this role is denied, I’m curious how these trained self-advocates involve and understand those who are not able to voice their opinions to those who do not understand them.  While pushing their agenda forward without understanding or allowing those with guardians to share their perspective and needs they are practicing discrimination against those more vulnerable than the self-advocates who can read, write and speak themselves.

The censorship that is practiced by several groups of trained self-advocates makes it appear that there is unanimity in their advocacy for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities.  In fact, the opposite is true.  Even when people write “I am interested in others perspective on this, other than my own” the editor will not allow another perspective to be shared.

This is one reason that I write on this blog – to share other opinions and learn from others.  I have learned a great deal by the fact that I have been blocked from several sites that are run by trained self-advocates.  They have no intention of understanding the needs of others and are acting like selfish adolescents who are rebelling against their parents.   Will they continue on their developmental path to adulthood?

Comments to NOS Magazine regarding Mental Age Theory Sept 2017

 

NOS Magazine would not publish a comment responding to another parent asking for others perspective

Mental Age?

Motive asymmetry – the belief that one groups motives are driven by love, care and affiliation and the rivals are motivated by the exact opposite.  This term is generally referred to with regards to political conflict but I see fully activated in the issue of advocacy for those with intellectual and developmental disabilities.

It feels to me that motive asymmetry is at play with regards to trained self-advocates and parents/guardians/healthcare professionals/case managers/disability advocates when any topic related to care, support, employment, inclusion, residential settings and community environment are discussed.

As a parent/guardian/disability advocate, this concept is very clear to me since I have been told by many trained self-advocates that guardians are only self-serving. This is truly not my perspective at all but it is attributed to me since I am a guardian. One effective tool used to help bridge this conflict is to meet in person. Once you know the person, views and ideas may change. It is only by meeting people and working together as people, rather adhering to  inflexible ideologies, that we can break down these silos and make progress.

Mental age theory

Ivanova Smith has written an article in NOS Magazine regarding the issue of using “mental age” as a description for people who happen to live with an intellectual and developmental disability.  She states “We need to educate medical professionals that there are better and more respectful way to explain the needs of people with Intellectual/developmental disabilities. Difficulty doing specific tasks isn’t the same thing as being an actual child.”

I have never seen this description used to state that an adult with IDD is a child – they are adults who have a variety of support needs in many areas of life skills.  Using labels and descriptive terms for various ranks, steps or skill levels are used in all types of employment, school, sports and athletics,  and hobbies.  One must pass through step 1 to get to step 2.  This is a natural progression.  One need not necessarily master the step but at least have a passing effort before one is able to proceed or progress.  There could be many reasons for a rapid or slow progression through these levels.
People do not excel in all areas of life and do not need to be an expert in everything they attempt to have enjoyment and meaning from it. Also, people may “stall out” at one step and many years later may revisit and then gain more skills. This is not set in stone as it is a fluid process and there is always learning and progress occurring as people experience life. This progression is also true with developmental, emotional and maturity stages. It is not “good” or “bad” but just is.

I often hear that people do not like labels – but labels help us to learn and navigate life in so many ways. Think for instance of working in trades – there are labels applied to levels of skill development – apprentice, journeyman, master. One is not a better person than another by having a different label but has a different skill set. These labels help us, who may not be familiar with the work to be done, who we might want to seek out for consultation. Labels are not inherently bad but can be extremely useful in many situations.
I am asking for your input into how you, as a trained self-advocate, differentiate between people who may need an extreme amount of support to manage the daily activities of living versus someone who may only need some occasional guidance with specific areas? How do you, as a trained self-advocate, differentiate between someone who is unable to utilize public transportation and needs to be driven everywhere in a private vehicle versus someone who can navigate the city independently on public buses?
Or maybe you do not see the need to differentiate – if not, why not?

Please contact me Ivanova – I would love to meet with you in person.

Thank you – Cheryl Felak

 

Have you ever heard the phrase “that person has the mind of a five year old In an adult body?” It is something many adults with intellectual disabilities, like me, have to deal with. For years, medical professionals have told parents of newly diagnosed Intellectually disabled people that they would mentally be children for their entire lives.…

via Mental Age Theory Hurts People with Intellectual Disabilities — NOS Magazine

#inclusivity  #diversityisstrength  #YouAreTheChange  #beyondinclusion  #disabilityrights  #intellectualdisability   #disabilitysupport  #mentalage  #agetheory